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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24279220">You can't keep running and running (you'll be running forever)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/French_Writings/pseuds/French_Writings'>French_Writings</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>broken people [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Voltron: Legendary Defender</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Break Up, M/M, ghosting, one word mention of assault</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-03 01:02:42</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>912</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24279220</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/French_Writings/pseuds/French_Writings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>keith doesn't know how to break up with lance so he ghosts him and is an asshole and a dumbass and m writing is kind of a mess but I think  it might still make sense</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Keith/Lance (Voltron)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>broken people [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1752658</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>15</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>You can't keep running and running (you'll be running forever)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Keith was bad at feelings. It wasn’t something new in his life. He didn’t like hugs and he wasn’t sure when an apology was acceptable. He didn’t know when to say thank you and couldn’t figure out how to phrase it when he did. It led to a bunch of issues in his life, led to his reputation of being an asshole and a jerk and everything else people decided he was. And a lot of the time it wasn’t even intentional, but, this time? This time, he </span>
  <em>
    <span>knew</span>
  </em>
  <span> he messed up.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was ghosting, he learned, after searching around for a while for the right term. It began with the realization of the source of his pain. The realization he didn’t love lance. He panicked, because that was something he didn’t think would happen. He panicked, and he avoided.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Lance has anxiety. It’s pretty bad sometimes, and Keith, Keith was overwhelmed. Because he still </span>
  <em>
    <span>cared</span>
  </em>
  <span> about how Lance was doing. He didn’t love Lance, not in any way he thought that mattered, but he </span>
  <em>
    <span>still</span>
  </em>
  <span> cared. That was issue number one. Because he cared and Lance had anxiety and he was avoiding Lance and he didn’t even know if an ‘I’m Sorry’ could cut it anymore.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He took it upon himself to make himself seem like he wasn’t online anymore. He knew Lance noticed because he sent an ‘Are you okay?’ text the day before. He didn’t click on it. He swiped it away and kept doing what he was before. He couldn’t face Lance, couldn’t talk to Lance knowing what he knew about the circumstances. And wasn’t that just him living up to his assholish persona? </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>God, even something as simple as breaking up was something he couldn’t do to Lance. He was such a pure soul, who didn’t deserve the asshole Keith was. He deserved to have love, from someone who could give it to him, instead of avoiding him like a coward. That’s what it was, the avoidance, it was all just from the fact that Keith was too much of a coward to admit his feelings. And wasn’t that a mindfuck. Because maybe it wasn’t cowardice. It was probably his pride that kept him from admitting the truth.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Keith was an idiot, and Lance was an idiot for loving him, and Keith was an idiot for falling for Lance when he knew it wouldn’t last. Lance was a bright gift in his life, and he knew he was dulling it by avoiding him he knew Lance was probably trying to figure out what he did to hurt Keith, to fuck up their relationship, drowning in misplaced guilt at every unread text. And Keith was an asshole and Keith was drowning because of that.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But, oh, how he deserved that drowning feeling. Because that’s what he was pulling Lance through. All the guilt and the shame he was feeling wasn’t misplaced. It was exactly what he should be feeling, he deserved more probably. Lance was probably a right mess, and here Keith was, ignoring him like he ignored most of his problems. Is that was Lance was to him now? A problem that he couldn’t solve by ignoring, but couldn’t deal with head-on?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Lance didn’t deserve this. Lance didn’t deserve to be ghosted, or broken up with, but here Keith was, doing exactly that. Keith knew he was bad at emotions. He knew he was terrible at communication, that he was an asshole, and that he hurt more people emotionally than physically. He knew he wasn’t in the right. But really, when was he ever. When did his decisions ever really put someone else in a better place for anyone other than himself? When was he not selfish with his actions? When did he stop caring about what other people were feeling in favor of his own thoughts? Was it something he grew into after he was assaulted, a way to protect himself from the inevitables of life, or was it something he had always done? Was he ever really not an asshole, and, if not, should people really be surprised about his actions? </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Pidge was so disappointed in him when she figured it out. “Really Keith?” She had started, walking into his room after he finished training. “Are you fucking serious? Do you see what this is doing to him?” He didn’t. He’s been avoiding even glancing his way. “Just rip off the bandage and tell him how you feel.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It isn’t that easy.” He explained, and the parts of his brain that agreed with her sighed. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>It isn’t”</span>
  </em>
  <span> he insisted as she turned to glare at him. And it wasn’t. Not for Keith. He didn’t know if he should make sure Lance had the support he’d definitely need afterward, didn’t know if he should make an apology gift and give it to Lance, or if he should just write a note and leave it where Lance could definitely see it. He couldn’t figure out how to phrase it in a way that wouldn’t sound more assholish than the situation already was.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Keith was bad at feelings and bad at communication and bad at relationships and he was ghosting Lance in hopes that he’d just leave because Keith was too much of an asshole to even think about just breaking up with him, and Lance was hurting in all the places that take forever to heal and probably blaming himself for that way things were turning out.</span>
</p>
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